The Last Day

“Scott Eccles?”“Yes!”“Please follow me.”Scott Eccles leapt from his seat, straightened tie, and surreptitiously placed fists on hips in the Superman pose, for he had watched a video online that said doing so can spike one's testosterone turn self-confidence. As followed nurse down hall, stride made clear: something big was about to happen.“Mr. Eccles, please have seat,” doctor distractedly as shown into examination room. The part avoided eye contact (a submissive tic, Scott heard), folded hands, pursed lips, fell silent—so seized chance.“Doc!” with smile, “Have you thought any more opportunity?”The snapped awake. “Sorry?”“Why, Ameriway opportunity!” Scott. “Don't tell me you've forgotten. Did read those brochures I left last time? Now, I'm no doctor, but lawsuit insurance! Doesn't practically sell itself?”“Sell what now?”“Now, now, know you're gonna say, already malpractice insurance. Required by your profession, know, I've all it. Terrible state of our country nowadays. But how much does insurance pay back, ask you!”“Pardon?”“That's precisely genius it,” continued, “It's simple! insurance, it two, just others—just two others, mind you. automatically collect portion premium you, likewise cut under sure aware, most MLMs require up eight or even twelves recruits before start collecting what's yours, it's only two. Just own legs stand on! No waiting months end, grinding out, making money almost immediately—growth is exponential, never-ending, worlds without end!”“Mr. . ”“I mean, absolutely everybody needs, right? Not like scented candles, oils, meal plans, other nonsense that, no—just sheer peace comes knowing you'll never again! In easily offended day age, ain't nothing bat an at. A single lawsuit, could ruin man—and then everything built yourself, house, wonderful family, sacrifices make through med school, swoosh, gone flash.”“I'm sorry?”“There's not another system old friend who, after networking One Health, NFL ”“. NFL?”“NFL, Friends Left,” quickly clarified. “He'd driven off everyone potential network. He'd gotten mixed Health folk wrong way, see—which really scam, I'll know—trying rope health supplements, preaching sky falling nutrients been sucked out ground pollution pesticides whatnot—I true all, going wrong, their network shambles, Henry got worst it.”“Sir.”“Anyways, my Harry—that name, Harry—he broke joke, bank foreclose lovely duplex, wife college sweetheart leaving him everything, started year ago, believe he's pullin’ ten grand week? Even successful gotta admit, that's pretty hefty chunk change.” paused emphasis.“Mr. your—”“Yes, yes, tests,” happily. “Thank me! You came very highly recommended wife's friends, know. That pain lower well, killing nothing, hasn't alone weeks what. fact, one good deserves another! Doc, why don't Emma invite over dinner? We treat missus ol’-fashioned barbecue talk these exciting opportunities some cuts finest brisket. ”“Mr. three months.”“Oh, challenge accepted, turning profit two—”“No, no, sorry, months. That's all.” And at let loose flurry medical jargon did clarify anything poor save fact months.“Now funny, doc ” finally said.“I sent tests lab twice, be sure,” continued doctor. “I reached university hospital where residency, each time prognosis back same: Maybe four. Words can't express sorry am.”Scott shifted uncomfortably chair. “So, coming Friday ”“I'm afraid will not.”“Listen, may need second opinion—”“You are right seek one, sincerely hope it'll different. won't.”“But surely there ”“There aren't.”“Should I, um, exercise ”“Won't difference.”“Medication ”“Scarcely development. None close market.”“Treatments ”“Experimental. Long shots. covered.”“I ”“You might well would do you.”“I bleed dry. still wouldn't change thing.”“So should ”“Get affairs order. Call friends. Reconcile enemies. Make love wife. Visit Paris if haven't already. God one. Whatever must do.”A pause. “So telling profoundly this happened run again wish ”But wandering office.Between hallway front door, Eccles's thinking underwent shift. gradual seismic cataclysm across landscape mind.By passed door frame, desperately trying remember sales pitch—not sort lingering affection hold something, anything, actively drained tongue water between fingers. By halfway short hallway, he'd forgotten completely, many others besides.As reentered room, every name entire magazine leafing minutes before, tried wanted astronaut archaeologist when grew up. lady reading romance, book wasn't class seminar.And stepped sunshine, bored kids parking lot snickered because running fingers hair strands comb-over were now high air. turned abruptly face them—not anger bewilderment, though seemed being child, couldn't like. congregation began slowly break parts verse, David Warner, young graduate student visiting home weekend, entered west foyer sat quietly row possibly time. He wore weary white shirt, un-cinched stained wrinkled slacks, first sprouting stubble attempted beard. Though refused soul it, throes full-blown faith crisis.And hated it—not felt fathers slipping away per se, horrid cliché himself becoming. yesterday, actually uttered aloud “I'm spiritual journey” winced. Good God, next, posting Reddit? Writing angry letters Church HQ? Last week, stumbled ex-Mormon blog (he longer say accident) wherein someone cited Arcade Fire's Suburbs chief consoling comfort exodused Church. Seriously, Neon Bible. What losing makes folks clichéd sentimental religion they leaving? With start, awoke; appeared fainted hood car, parked tree shade. His keys hands. thin line sweat collected brow upper lip. collected, briefly entertained possibility dream. calmly considered shadows leaves weaved windshield him, sun peeking shimmering through, while branches swayed softly wind, counting moment another—Scott feet dashed car wild panic. knew normal litany reasons people leave, ready response once relied upon, example: Lord uses imperfect men work; Mormon polygamist wives among foremost suffragists western United States; who bring Mountain Meadows always conspicuously ignore Missouri; declaring Book Abraham Breathings belies we either; horses Mormon, too. also used inspiring, Abrahamic, Church's treatment LGBTQ didn't anymore, since November 2015. Increasingly, lived area years, became disoriented wandered sidewalks. Oddly, occur pull phone directions. realized blur landmarks drove them by, pauses traffic lights, hard hugged curve road. foot, streams faceless storefronts suddenly faces; unfamiliar, strange, new. Frightened, unpracticed jog. dad long perfect church till us in, hypocrites—but lately, religious hypocrisy getting above else. remembered teenager picked new teaching companion outside Del Taco strip mall. They panhandler corner, sight which Brother rant laziness, unthriftiness, sinful entitlement homeless, simply want work preferred leech others—all within recruit latest pyramid scheme. “Do right, life again,” galling lack self-awareness. David's later instructed laugh off, bear bears us—though rumor told private stay hell son. particularly hot today, unusual late fall. Yet think remove suit jacket, nor loosen collar, Sunday shoes, matter blistered staggered broken pavement. uncomfortable, nevertheless experienced primal, unthinking feel aching body could. If true, especially gutsy, member bishopric Of course, spot tacit institutional approval whatever represented? Almighty inspire bishop Holy Spirit select snake-oil salesman, counselor? stake president inspired call anoint such bishop? called president? ladder went, wondered—and feared. So thoughts memories pores curious vague sense recognition center. worn morning, not? doctor's office two-hour block? Why struck urgently come morning? past wonder now. Without either wanting to, toward entrance; gripped handle hard, familiar. Mechanically, habitually, Warner partook bread sacrament, nothing—and more, feared begin with. When certain edge argued based than “subjective experience,” blurted “But subjective experience! we're experiencing real not! walk alone.” basic Descartes, said, Plato's allegory cave, plot Inception, Matrix, first-week Philosophy 101. applauded sophistication cleverness. see point along—it subjective, vain.As testimonies meeting began, leaned forward bench, rubbed face, offered silent prayer: ever sign. blue carpets, brick walls, correlated art hangs North American chapel. faces congregation, years seen them, stared aisle—with shock catastrophic regret, all. heart groaned him; testimony first. Rolling eyes, decided wait until end meeting. best sign deliver, indeed Day, Great Terrible, association Jesus Christ Latter-day Saints. Standing awkwardly podium, words usually did. An uncomfortable silence upon congregation.Then erupted, convulsing sobs filled Hot tears streamed cries reverberating feedback microphone. crumpled onto podium cry loudly, showing signs ceasing. shoulders, whole being, shook terribly. help up, slid wailing wildly recklessly floor. bawling babies chapel transfixed, awful knot twisting collective stomachs, heaving was, “We're die, die responses varied ward. Some sacrament early, disturbed distraught haze. Others profound pity wondered maybe meal, fully aware little gesture mean—both themselves. Still touch resentment Scott, ruined needed hour grateful change.As absolute rest fast After closing prayer, stood slowly, deliberately, paced building, ignoring greetings. lot, fumbled dropped ground. Instead bending reach gazed beheld trees breeze. Abruptly, eyes water, swooned him. Slowly, brought fist teeth, swelling breast cheeks, whispered: thank Almighty,